


The Kuschel-Land Ball

by eafay70



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-09-09
Packaged: 2018-12-17 07:45:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11847090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eafay70/pseuds/eafay70
Summary: The mascots and plushies have been invited to a ball to celebrate the restart of football across Europe! Can they actually behave like dignified ladies and gentlemen, or will rivalries get the better of them?





	1. The Invitation

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back!!!!!! I should be catching up on sleep, but this needed to be introduced. :)

Benny ran through the trees of Kuschel-Land as quickly as he could. He knew he had to get back to his Queen soon so they could all catch up on sleep, but this task had to be completed first!

The Nerd jumped for joy when he saw a blue dragon in BVB socks talking to a lion. "Matze! Mars!"

Both creatures smiled when they caught sight of their friend running up to meet them. "Benny! Hallo!" said Matze happily.

"How are you guys?" Benny gave each one an envelope. "I have invitations!"

To the American's utter shock, both Freiburgers started crying. "Why are you speaking English?!" Mars shouted. "We don't like English! English speakers are meanies!"

"What was that?!" A rather famous orange dragon flew on the scene to confront the young lion. "Are you calling your own mother a meanie? And your Mistress? And your new friend, and his friends, and their Queen?"

The lion nuzzled against Matze sadly. "A lot of English speakers make fun of us for speaking Scots instead of real English," he whispered.

"What?! Who?!" demanded Benny. "I'll stomp them to smithereens for being cruel!"

"You need sleep," argued Matze. "We'll talk about it later. For now, you go back to your Queen, and we'll read the invitation."

"Sounds good," yawned Benny. "Bye!" He wobbled away, already dreaming of sleep.

Fechtar - for who else could the rather famous orange dragon be? - opened Mars' envelope and read:

_You are cordially invited to a ball celebrating the return of football across Europe_  
_(and the return of the court of Queen EAFay to linguistic freedom)_  
_Romantic couples are strongly encouraged to attend together, as there will be several opportunities to dance together_  
_Children and parents are strongly encouraged to attend together, as they will also be afforded several opportunities to dance together_

"I have to tell Tiny!" She flew off right away.

"We have to ask Berni for the balloons from the other night!" Matze ran off with Mars to spread the word.


	2. Preparing for the Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Berni needs help with the balloons for the ball. Bulli needs cheering up after the first weekend of the Bundesliga season. Can they help each other? (Yes, of course!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This past week was rather hectic, including a trip out of state over the weekend. I managed to (somewhat) catch up on sleep today, so I have just enough time to post this!
> 
> Please note that this chapter takes place before the second weekend of the Bundesliga season. ;-)

Berni sighed. When he'd found out about the Kuschel-Land ball, he'd recognized immediately that the balloons from the opening Bundesliga match would be perfect decoration. Unfortunately, he hadn't taken into consideration that ten rain-soaked balloons would prove very difficult to manage by himself. He'd only just set foot (or rather, paw) in Kuschel-Land and was already worn out!

The Bavarian bear looked around, hoping to spot someone who could help him. The only figure he saw was sitting a short distance away: Bulli, the RB Leipzig bull. Perfect!

"Bulli!" Berni ran towards his fellow mascot...only to fall over within a few steps because of all the balloons. "Argh!"

The bull slowly walked over and helped the bear sit up. "Are you okay?"

"I think so. I was wondering if -" Berni couldn't help notice how very unhappy Bulli seemed. "Is something the matter?"

Bulli nodded, clearly trying not to cry. "We lost to Schalke! We were really bad, and that was without European football to worry about!" He sniffled. "And nobody likes us! It's not our fault we have a different history!"

Berni pulled Bulli into a bear hug. "One match doesn't set the season in stone, Bulli. You guys will come out swinging next time, I'm sure. And believe me, there's plenty of time to work out any kinks before the group stages - I'm willing to bet that they'll have to have country protections in the knockout draw because of us!"

Bulli blinked away his tears and managed to nod a little. "But why are so many people mean to us? What if they're mean in other places, too?"

"People tend to get angry when another team wins a lot. And they tend to get angry when there's something different about the winner, too. But it isn't really personal." Berni smiled. "Some of the best hugs I've ever received have come from the people who hate Bayern the most. They're jealous of what I represent, but they can't help loving a Maskottchen. Same thing throughout Europe - the Gunners love hugging me!"

"OK." Bulli smiled and returned the hug. "Danke."

"Gerne." Berni lowered his arms - and gasped. "The balloons! I wanted to ask if you'd help me with the balloons for the ball, but they're gone!"

"I see them!" Bulli pointed to the forest behind them. "Hurry!"

The bear and the bull gave chase, hoping to find all of the balloons in a timely fashion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ideas are welcome! :D :D


	3. Super Trouper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since the Bundesliga opened with a live rendition of the German national anthem, the Kuschel-Land ball opens with a live rendition of one of the host Nerd's favorite songs. More music follows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With a big hug of gratitude to mariothellama. <3

Benny squealed with excitement as the guests took their seats. The end of the transfer window had been exhausting for everyone, and more than a few attendees needed cheering up. The ball would do the trick!

"Hi, everyone!" The Nerd waited for the crowd to settle down before continuing. "Welcome to the Kuschel-Land Ball! I want to get started with a little something dedicated to...well, everyone!"

_Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me_   
_But I won't feel blue_   
_Like I always do_   
_'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you_

To Benny's relief, most of the plushies in attendence began bopping their heads to the music. The ties and handkerchiefs started fluttering, and the mascots clapped in rhythm. So Benny continued to sing, with a few of his friends doing the backup parts.

_I was sick and tired of everything_   
_When I called you last night from Glasgow_   
_All I do is eat and sleep and sing_   
_Wishing every show was the last show (Wishing every show was the last show)_

The dragons, of course, preened a little bit at the mention of a Scottish city. Benny thought he spotted Fechtar's husband giving her snout a kiss, too!

_So imagine I was glad to hear you're coming (Glad to hear you're coming)_   
_Suddenly I feel all right_   
_(And suddenly it's gonna be) And it's gonna be so different when I'm on the stage tonight..._

At this point, several attendees started singing along.

_Tonight the Super Trouper (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per) lights are gonna find me_   
_Shining like the sun (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)_   
_Smiling, having fun (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)_   
_Feeling like a number one_

Berni and Jay high-fived at that reference, which prompted most of the Bundesliga mascots to affectionately roll their eyes.

_Tonight the Super Trouper (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per) beams are gonna blind me_   
_But I won't feel blue (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)_   
_Like I always do (Sup-p-per Troup-p-per)_   
_'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you_

Benny and his friends finished the song (which is a bit too long to be fully transcribed here), then took several bows. "The dance floor is now open!"

The magic trees providing the music looped the opening bars a few times to give everyone time to reach the dance floor. Fechtar was escorted to the center by none other than her son, Mars the lion (who had apologized for insulting English speakers, of course).

_When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary_   
_When troubles come and my heart burdened be_   
_Then I am still and wait here in the silence_   
_Until you come and sit awhile with me_

Benny, who was dancing with Matze the dragon, couldn't help smiling at the sight of Erwin and Fritzle dancing on either side of Emma. Fechtar had thought of the perfect first dance!

_You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains_   
_You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas_   
_I am strong, when I am on your shoulders_   
_You raise me up, to more than I can be_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Super Trouper" is by ABBA.
> 
> "You Raise Me Up" is originally by Secret Garden, though the Westlife version and Josh Groban version are also awesome.


	4. Save the Last Dance for Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ball is in full swing. One brave mascot decides to sing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blue_Night wanted a crocodile. =D  
> And mariothellama wanted "Somebody" by Depeche Mode, as it was Fechtar's wedding song. =D

Everything was going very well. The ball attendees loved the make-your-own burger bar; Benny was relieved that there were enough vegetarian patties for the dragons and others who didn't eat meat, as past events in his homeland had run into that problem. The Belgian-style fries were a big hit, as were the tiny sorbets.

Speaking of "Tiny," Fechtar was currently in the process of ordering her husband to the dance floor. Their song was playing, after all!

_I want somebody to share,_  
_Share the rest of my life_  
_Share my innermost thoughts_  
_Know my intimate details_

"How can you NOT want to dance to 'Somebody'?! Don't you remember our wedding?!" Fechtar looked very unhappy with Tiny.  
"Tanz!" Mars ordered. The young lion stood menacingly in front of Tiny's chair. "No more sitting!"

_Someone who'll stand by my side_  
_And give me support_  
_And in return_  
_She'll get my support_

Tiny harrumphed dramatically, but held Fechtar lovingly and danced anyway. Mars spoke for everyone present with his reaction: "Aww!!"

Meanwhile, Fritzle the crocodile from Stuttgart was sitting at his table and thinking. He wanted to ask Emma to dance with him - not as romantically as Fechtar and Tiny were dancing, but rather as friends. After all, the beloved BVB bee had already danced with a few mascots, most recently Erwin. But Fritzle couldn't help fear Emma turning him down, so he continued to sit.

"Fritzle, what's the matter?" Benny sat down next to the crocodile. "Do you not like your cake? I'm terrible at geography, so I don't know if Stuttgart is in the Black Forest, but I figured you'd like Black Forest cake anyway..."

"Stuttgart is about an hour away," Fritzle said. "And the cake is excellent. I'm just debating whether or not to ask Emma to dance."

"I see." The blue nerd hummed in thought, wishing he had arms so he could stroke an imaginary beard. "Maybe you could ask her in a song. I was going to sing again, but you could sing instead."

Fritzle perked up at this idea. "What were you going to sing?" he asked before taking another bite of cake.

"Save the Last Dance for Me." Benny smiled wistfully. "It's one of my Queen's favorite songs. She sometimes imagines singing it to her multilingual Jewish Prince Charming if he turns out to be more outgoing than she is."

"I know that song!" Fritzle clapped happily. "I could totally sing it!"

"Finish your cake, and then you're on!" Benny hurried to the front of the room to set up a microphone.

About a minute later, Fritzle was standing at the microphone and introducing his song. "This is for anyone who's ever been sitting there while everyone else dances."

_You can dance every dance with the guy_  
_Who gives you the eye, let him hold you tight_  
_You can smile every smile for the man_  
_Who held your hand 'neath the pale moonlight_  
_But don't forget who's taking you home_  
_And in whose arms you're gonna be_  
_So, darling, save the last dance for me_

As Fritzle sang, he wondered if this was the best song to use for this purpose. After all, each mascot would go home separately - how was Emma supposed to know that he wanted to dance with her before that happened? Nevertheless, he found that singing was fun, so he kept at it.

_Oh, I know that the music's fine_  
_Like sparkling wine, go and have your fun_  
_Laugh and sing, but while we're apart_  
_Don't give your heart to anyone_  
_But don't forget who's taking you home_  
_And in whose arms you're gonna be_  
_So, darling, save the last dance for me_

The crocodile sang the rest of the song. He was happy, albeit surprised, to see that quite a few bowties, neckties, and handkerchiefs had taken to the dance floor for this particular number. They could really swing!

Once the song ended, Erwin ran up to Fritzle and offered a high five. "That was so cool! Benny says I can sing next."

"Awesome!" Fritzle returned the high five and hurried to the corner of the room where Emma was standing. With the courage he'd gained from singing in public, he asked, "Emma, may I have this dance?"

"Yes!" Emma replied. She and Fritzle walked to the center of the dance floor. "Benny said you sang for me. That's so nice!"

Fritzle blushed as Erwin announced, "I dedicate this song number to all of us who have had to bid beloved players farewell. We'll all meet them again, I'm sure."

_Somewhere, beyond the sea_  
_Somewhere, waitin' for me_  
_My lover stands on golden sands_  
_And watches the ships that go sailin'_

Benny stood in the back of the room and smiled at the crocodile and bee dancing together. He supposed that the singing squire was thinking of his longtime captain now in the care of a zebra.

_Somewhere, beyond the sea_  
_She's there, watchin' for me_  
_If I could fly like birds on high_  
_Then straight to her arms, I'll go sailin'_

All in all, it was a lovely evening. The blue nerd and his friends had properly celebrated!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Save the Last Dance for Me" is originally by The Drifters. I personally was imagining the Michael Buble version, but any version works.
> 
> "Beyond the Sea" is originally by Jack Lawrence, with music by Charles Tenet from his song "La Mer." The most famous version is by Bobby Darin, though my favorite version is by Robbie Williams, as heard at the end of "Finding Nemo."


	5. The Wraithy-Bear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benny and Herthinho investigate an unusual presence in the woods. It turns out to be a new friend. =]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I had originally planned for the previous chapter to be the last chapter, Blue_Night made a request that I couldn't resist. :D
> 
> You can see Toddy the Wraithy-Bear [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1861335/chapters/4015455) \- and you should!!

Benny stared out the window at the magic forest. The leaves were fluttering unusually loudly; at first, the nerd had thought that they were trying to dance to the music from the ball, but the current song was much slower than they were fluttering. What could it mean?

“What are you looking at, Benny?” Herthinho joined him at the window. “Is there something in the forest?”

“I don’t know.” The nerd sighed. “I’m still relatively new to Kuschel-Land. Does it mean something when the leaves flutter so much?”

“It usually means that there’s someone in the forest who isn’t normally in the forest,” explained Herthinho. “I was once playing hide and seek with Fritzle, and the leaves were fluttering, so I looked in the forest and there he was! We stopped playing hide and seek in the forest after that.”

“I don’t blame you for that.” Benny and Herthinho continued to observe the forest. “Should we go investigate?”

“Let’s go!” The bear from Berlin followed the blue nerd outside.

As soon as they entered the forest, Benny and Herthinho began looking behind every tree. “Hello?” Benny called out. “Please come out, whoever you are!”

“We’re very nice,” Herthinho added. “You can come to the ball with us if you want – the food’s really good, and you don’t have to dance if you don’t want to!”

After about a minute of searching, Benny heard a very soft gasp. He tilted his head to signal Herthinho to come closer. The bear complied and whispered, “Please come out! I’m not scary, even though I’m a very tall bear!”

There was a brief pause before a creature came into view. “Everyone thinks I’m scary,” he said.

“I don’t!” Benny protested. “I think you look cool!”

The blue-gray creature was about the same size as Benny. He was bear-like, but not exactly a teddy bear – teddy bears didn’t usually have shoulder-length hair or a goatee like he did. His eyes were gold, and the tattoo on his face reminded Benny of rock and roll.

“I’m Herthinho from Hertha Berlin.” The taller bear held out a paw, which the shorter bear shook politely. “What’s your name?”

“Toddy.” He managed a small smile. “I’m a Wraith…well, a Wraithy-bear, but close enough.”

“I’m Benny. I’m a nerd!” He smiled widely, as did Herthinho. “Are you from outer space? You look like you come from outer space, like the Vulcans, except you’re definitely not from Star Trek. I know Star Trek very well.”

“I’m originally from a small galaxy called Pegasus,” explained Toddy. “It’s a companion of a huge galaxy called Andromeda.”

“I’ve heard of it!” Herthinho said. “Do you still live there?”

“No. I lived in Atlantis for a long time.”

“Stargate?” Benny asked. Toddy nodded. “Cool! What brings you here?”

“Mommy told me to go to the ball because it would be fun.” Toddy sighed sadly. “But most of the time, I scare everyone away. So I stayed out here.”

“Do we know your Mommy?” Benny asked. “My Queen is the Werder fan who was in Vermont over the summer.”

Toddy nodded. “My Mommy is your Queen’s German beta. She says your Queen speaks really, really good German.”

Benny blushed slightly. “Your Mommy’s English is way better than my Queen’s German.”

Herthinho’s stomach suddenly growled. “I want another burger,” he declared. “Toddy, do you want to come to the ball with us? The burgers are really good – you can put anything you want on them! And there’s cake, too!”

“Please????” Benny wasn’t terribly good at making cute pleading eyes, but he tried his best. “We want everyone at the ball who wants to be at the ball!”

Toddy stared at the ground in uncertainty. On the one hand, Mommy wouldn’t hold it against him if he was too scared to go – she’d just cuddle him and make him feel better. On the other hand, he was a Wraithy-bear, which meant he was essentially a Wraith, and Wraith weren’t supposed to be scared of anything. Plus, these two seemed very nice, so maybe the others at the ball would be very nice, too.

“Okay.” He looked up and smiled at his new friends. “Let’s go!”

Toddy fit in very well at the ball – he even danced to KISS with Benny! Nobody was scared of him, and the food was of course excellent. Mommy would be proud!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed!

**Author's Note:**

> Character requests are gladly accepted!


End file.
